The inability to ask you questions back.

If someone cannot commit to that, it’s time to cut your losses. In the end, the point of online dating is to meet in person.

An unwillingness to meet (or video-chat/call these days) in a timely fashion.

Either this person is only looking for one thing or is highly self-absorbed. Where’s the fire? If someone says, “Write to me at this email address because my subscription ends tomorrow,” then beware.

An urgency to connect offline immediately.

Every message should include something specific to you. A long message sharing only information about him or herself and nothing about you.As an addendum to that, anything showing bias towards or against a whole group of people is a major red flag. Whenever I see this, I think, “This person is bitter or not over an ex.” Write what you do want, not what you don’t. A long list of things someone does not want in a partner.especially with no one in them - show that this person is trying to compensate for something (looks, personality?) with “stuff.” Ultimately, people just want to see who is going to show up on the date. What are they trying to prove? Too many (or any) photos with fancy cars, boats, etc. Again, many people try to “game” the system by lowering their age to try to fit into younger prospects’ target range, but a lie is a lie, even if the person comes clean in the text of the profile. Contradicting information or a different age listed in the profile than the text.

This shows that someone does not have confidence in who he or she is today and is not only living in the past but is trying to deceive you into meeting using falsely misleading information. (Or is so very recently single that this person does not have any photos alone.) Photos with old time/date stamps or that are very obviously old.Below are some common red flags to look out for:

It’s up to you to decide how important each is to you. Some may simply mean that the person is not ready to date, while others may be indicative of a bigger concern. What’s the biggest red flag I should look for while scouring dating profiles?įirst, not all red flags are the same. Remember that if you have a question, chances are likely that someone else has the same one, too. Every day, I get interesting questions from clients, and today, I’d like to tackle three questions I received recently.

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